On Why I Shouldn't Be Expected To Know Anything... Ever

I am on record saying that coincidence is one of the most soul-sappingly fatalistic of random occurrences. I think I should revise. I always forget during the off-season.

Quiz bowl is the MOST by range of at least six coulombs.

For those of you living under a rock (or rather, those of you who are not living under a rock, just those who don't care about really unimportant things)quiz bowl - aka academic challenge - is a competitive trivia circuit. If you've ever seen 'Mean Girls,' it's kind of like the matha-leet competition, only filled with every subject of knowledge and way less Lindsey Lohan, which is a bad thing (Screw the media! Lohan, you rock!).

At any given time throughout a given tournament, there are a total of 9 important people in the room (or 9 really unimportant people trying to hide that fact): 2 teams of four players, and one reader. Note: substitutes and whatnot do exist, but my writing flows much better without mentioning them... Woops.

These two teams will via for the chance to answer the reader's questions with their almighty buzzers. The reader recognizes whoever buzzes first, the team takes a moment to confer, and delivers the answer for approval or bitter disembowelment by their team for getting it wrong. I kid... it is more of a lobotomy.

Now to the point: quiz bowl questions have a notorious nature of including the most esoteric facts possible. For example, did you know that Wounded Knee was both a battle and a movie? No? GOOD. Or, have you ever suffered through an 'obscure musical-architectural advances near Asian rivers of the 21st century relating to Bill O'Riley?' Perhaps you now know the feelings of a quiz-bowler.

Hence, why our team motto has become the title of this blog post: "I shouldn't be expected to know anything... ever." The random occurrence of insight, and the process of giving a correct answer to these even more random 'brain breakers' can not be expected, studied for, nor - some argue - cogently understood.

Therefore, my conclusion: no, I do not know who painted panel six of the East side Gallery. Just because I am the 'art' person does not mean I can be expected to know anything... ever. (especially when you only let me hear the first part of the two part question.)

Maintain the Decorum.